The Bub gets into a fight!

A few weeks back, I saw a familiar number appear on the screen of my phone while I was at work. It was the number of Bub’s childcare centre. My heart sank as I knew it was probably bad news if the childcare centre had to make a call to me in the middle of the day. Bub’s form teacher started apologising to me the instant I picked up the phone. She stated that the Bub got into a fight with his classmate and he suffered a bite mark on his chest as a result.

I was upset that he was hurt but I understood that the Bub could be at fault himself as he has a pretty short fuse just like me. We don’t really blow up, but if provoked, the both of us have a really shitty temper that cannot be quelled easily. I told his teacher that as long as the Bub is fine, I got no worries regarding the matter. I thanked her for informing me and I told her that I would pick him up from the centre at the usual time.

On my way to pick up the bub, I asked myself to find the best possible way to approach this incident with the Bub. Due to my tiny build, I have been an easy target for attacks from bullies and crazy folks in the past. Was somebody picking on him in school or was he the one dishing out the bullying instead? For selfish reasons, I hoped that he was the bully instead of the victim as I didn’t want him to be too badly hurt. But at the same time, I would not want another child to be on the receiving of my child’s bad manners.

As I walked up the driveway leading to the entrance of his centre, I heard his teacher call out his name and saw his little silhouette scurry quickly from the holding area to the entrance of the centre. When I got to the entrance, all I saw was my little baby boy looking at me with the most pitiful eyes. His hair was messy and his uniform was scrunched up. As I bent over to give him a hug, he started whining about the fight that he got into earlier in the day.

Here’s an excerpt of our conversation.

Me: What happened? Who did you get into a fight with?
Bub: It was J!
Me: What? I thought he was your best friend?
Bub: Yeah! But I was trying to sleep and he took his pillow and hit me many times!
Me: So did you tell the teacher?
Bub: No! He hit me many times with the pillow! So I was angry and I punched him!
Me: OMG…(I can’t believe he actually threw the first punch!)
Bub: After I punched him, he bit me on my body!!! So I bit him back also lor!
Me: Speechless…

So that’s how Bub’s first official childcare scrap went. I guess it ended up in a draw as both of them suffered bite marks on their chests!

I told the Bub that it was not right to punch his friends just because they were hitting him. Two wrongs do not make a right and I warned him that I would be very upset if he were to be throwing punches at anyone at school again, even if he was provoked. I told him that the best way to end any conflict is to walk away from the attacker and inform the teachers in charge.

I told him to make sure he apologises to J the next day and made him promise that he would not fight with his friends anymore.

That said, this incident made me consider sending the tiny Bub for self defense lessons so that he can learn discipline and some ways to defend himself from the bigger, badder kids in school.